Amabel Villa's Thieving Ghost

The 5 Freelancers came into the Mikumwesauk halfling's office and looked around, bemused by its fancy wall paper and high shelves.  They seated themselves as he pulled a stack of papers out of his desk drawer, squaring them on the desktop and then, glancing at the others, reordering a couple.  Then he started reading the papers.

First two ‒ hunt things for House Hadid:  phase spider venom & silk, and troll teeth & blood.

Cathance: where do we think the trolls are?
Naranjos:  occasionally in the tunnels inside the skylith.  Phase spiders are near the western end of the mountains.

Amabel Villa ‒ we've neglected it a while, but we still have a contract to clear it out.  Previously, a couple eighths ago, Dryali, Ondar, and Nix cleared out the rooms in the north corners of the second floor.  Before that, Freelancers cleared the room in between and wrecked a flying undead shark.

Ondar:  wasn't aware non-flying undead sharks existed
Hikawera:  could be on a thalassa
<Narrator voice:  the GM said, "there is, NOW">
Naranjos:  250 eagles each, you can keep any magic items that you find.

Next ‒ second, er, more investigate that marriage ruination.  250 eagles each.

Last one ‒ 250 eagles to investigate or stop flying constructs which are harassing students at the Sugar Glider School of Hanglgiding.

There were more papers in the stack, but that's all Naranjos read out.  He squared them again and looked at the other Freelancers expectantly, eyes amused.

Cathance:  "harassing"
Naranjos:  so far
Hikawera:  so not as bad as the ones in the tunnels
<Pause as nobody had anything to say to that.>
Hikawera:  minor preference for tracking down the wedding crasher.
Tuala:  interested in Amabel Villa.  Also the constructs, since we can all fly.  The investigation is more what-the-actual-fuck than direct interrogations.
Hikawera:  constructs 2nd order.
Quelenna:  I have no preference
Ondar:  would prefer the villa over constructs.  Ondar has magic items to replace.
Hikawera:  what happened?
Ondar:  Ondar does not wish to discuss it.
Cathance:  are we in danger of defaulting on contract with Amabel?
Naranjos:  no, they are ridiculously rich and also kind of stupid, we are not in danger of this.  <hesitated>  there are rumours of a lucrative diamond mine the Amabels just found.
Cathance:  then constructs is interesting.  But also the villa.  <to the others>  these will be the most lucrative.
Hikawera:  will be a little less useful at the villa, because no shatter.
Cathance:  <unreadable notes>
Naranjos:  which, then?
Ondar:  Ondar has strong preference for Amabel
Everyone:  okay then

They left Naranjos' office discussing how to enter the villa, and concluded they'd retrace the path previous Freelancers took, in case hostiles had reestablished themselves there.

The Freelancers flew over to the Amabel Villa on their mounts.  It didn't take very long once the mounts were saddled and ready, as the Villa was maybe 15 minutes' flight east-southeast of Freelancers Villa.  Hikawera wanted to investigate the previously cleared areas, so they went in to the 2nd floor balcony.

Ondar, Cathance, and Tuala milled about uncertainly.  What's to investigate?  Cathance started pointing out to Ondar all the things she'd encountered previously and what happened, the big quinametzin nodding as the small Mikumwesauk halfling explained.  The others started checking the abandoned harpy nests, which Tuala saw were undisturbed.

Hikawera:  glad to see someone else is competent
Ondar <flexed>:  you don't get all this, and brains too
Hikawera:  fair

Hikawera and Quelenna checked the stairs downward to their right, they were clear.  Hikawera then looked where the blood ooze had been, which had a big suspicious stain, which in the Fire sagani's opinion did ot seem as… dry as it should be.

Hikawera cast vicious mockery at it, exclaiming "That's not even a good shade of red!"  Nothing seemed to happen, but it got Tuala and Cathance's attention.  They both used prestidigitation, and the "wet" faded out.  Frowning, Tuala looked for a trail; Cathance looked up.  The ceiling was hard for her to see, so she used prestidigitation on a window, which lightened up the room a bit (although the daylight was considerably blocked by growth of vines).  Hikawera cast produce flame to shed more light, then walked around the stain through the door, then drew his rapier and poked it.

Nothing happened, so all the Freelancers went into that room.  It used to be a bedroom, and held a closet/armoire as well as a broken-down bed.  To their left was a door, only partly hanging on its hinges, the room beyond obviously somewhat lit.  The room they were in was pretty dark, Hikawera's produce flame being the only light beyond what got past the door.

Hikawera:  Ondar, mind moving this door so we can see?
Ondar:  is Ondar the only one who can see?

Everyone looked at Cathance, who was the only one who could not see.  Cathance pulled out her gem of brightness, and commanded it to produce ordinary light, then started looking around with interest.

"Fuck it," Ondar swore, and moved the door.  Despite his intention to just move it to the side, he ended up forcing it open, so it was still partly hanging on its hinges.  The room beyond was dimly lit, and everyone looked, curiously.

Halfway across the room, there were stairs leading downward, ostensibly to the atrium; the daylight was filtering up from them.  Closed double doors were opposite the door the Freelancers peered through.  There was a chaise lounge or perhaps a fainting couch beyond the stairs, with end-tables, perhaps other tables.

Hikawera pushed past Ondar to stand next to the stairs, and Tuala moved up next to Ondar.  The three of them checked for traps, but saw nothing.  Then all the Freelancers piled into the room, looking around curiously.

The end tables had glasses and tankards, and some other tables had game boards; these also had drawers.  A card table was to the left of the stairs, which also had drawers.  Everything was covered in dust.

Three desiccated corpses clambered out from behind the couch and a chair.  The Freelancers looked at each other and made a face.  They had apparently been on the floor on the far side of the room, but everyone pictured them sitting in the furniture sporting the empty glasses and tankards, a more amusing image to be sure.

Hikawera:  this is fine
Cathance:  we don't get paid if it's on fire.
Hikawera:  my hand is still on fire!
Ondar:  we absolutely do, they bought it sight unseen.
Tuala:  there's nothing we can't fix with mending

The ghost of a male humanoid faded in behind Hikawera.

The ghost hesitated, considering Hikawera, then tried to steal his Alchemy Jug, but Hikawera twisted out of his way.

• The ghost hissed, then swiped at Hikawera twice with far-too-corporeal claws.  The second strike slashed the bard, leaving necrosis in its wake.

Cathance cried out, "Guys!  There's a ghost!!!"  She looked back and forth at the risen skeletons and the ghost, then expended a charge on the gem of brightness at the ghost, but it avoided the beam.

• The three skeletons moved towards the Freelancers.
  • One swiped a claw at Tuala and missed.
  • One swiped at Cathance and missed.
  • The last one tried to jump over the stairs to get to Hikawera but failed and landed on the stairway below.
• Hikawera was entirely unimpressed with the showing of their adversaries, but upset about the Alchemy Jug.  "Really?  The Alchemy Jug?  You don't even have a stomach to enjoy mayonnaise!" he exclaimed, casting vicious mockery at the ghost.
  • Then, to everyone's surprise, the bard cast spiritual weapon in the form of a sousaphone next to the ghost.  The weapon tried to strangle the ghost and struck him with force.
  • The ghost was appearing tattered already, and Hikawera stared at him in exaggerated disappointment.
• Ondar became large, then attacked the ghost twice with his magical rapier, piercing it the first time, but missing it the second.
• Quelenna moved behind Cathance, and used her fans over the halfling's head at the attacking skeleton.  The result was a whirlwind of desiccated flesh and bone chips.
  • Smoothly folding the fans into her fists, she invoked flurry of blows, punching the skeleton in the sternum so it exploded, then jumping over Cathance to kick the skeleton attacking Tuala.
  • Cathance was visibly happy there was no longer a skeleton next to her.
• Tuala was feeling lucky, so he simply shot the skeleton next to him with a firebolt.  It started smouldering, but was still on its feet.

The ghost considered Hikawera again, then tried to steal his magical cittern, but Hikawera again avoided it.

• The ghost growled angrily.  He slashed at the Fire sagani again… and critfailed.  His clawed hand overstretched and literally disappeared.  
• Disappointed, he rose up through the ceiling.  
• Hikawera pierced the ghost with his rapier, but Large Ondar missed with his.

Cathance cried out, "Guys!  That thing is above us!!!"  She was so discombobulated, a bolt of pure chaos shot out from her hand, like a writhing trail of black smoke, and struck the skeleton attacking Tuala.  It turned to acid on contact and the skeleton melted into a noisome goo.

• The skeleton on the stairs clawed at Tuala, who popped shield to avoid it.  The nekomata's shield wasn't going to hold, so Cathance used her sorcerous ability to bend luck.  The claw struck the shield and iridescent interlocking gears appeared to block it.
• Hikawera moved the spiritual weapon sousaphone to the skeleton on the stairs, and it "blatted" at the creature, striking it with force.
  • The bard looked around for the ghostly pickpocket, and held himself ready with more vicious mockery should the ghost reappear.
• Large Ondar tried to jump over the railing and land on the skeleton, but because of his position, landed next to it.  The quinametzin pierced it with his magical rapier, and the skeleton exploded.
• Quelenna, lacking adversaries, sauntered to the double doors and kicked them open, revealing what had to be the master bedroom, from its size.
  • To her left was a long, narrow portion with 2 armoires.  Moving right there was a chair, night tables, and (to the right) the remains of a large bed, from which a female ghost rose, apparently garbed in pyjammies.
  • Because, if you have to spend a nigh-eternal afterlife stuck in the bedroom, why wouldn't you want to be in pyjammies.  I am wearing pyjammies right now, as I type this.  They are very comfy.
  • Anyhow…
    Quelenna:  o look!  More friends!
    Tuala:  wonderful
    Hikawera:  lovely
  • Quelenna punched at the ghost and critfailed, meaning the ghost's ectoplasmic pyjammies left the Wild elf numb in her limbs for a few seconds, unable to attack anything.
• Tuala followed Quelenna but mindful of the "more friends," stayed 30' back.  He spotted the ghost and shot a firebolt at her, but somehow the bolt had a recoil that knocked him prone when he critfailed.
  • At least he didn't set the place on fire.
  • The nekomata used cat zoomies to stand up and move towards the narrow portion of the room.

The male ghost descended from the ceiling and tried to steal Cathance's tortoise necklace!

• Hikawera exclaimed, "Really?  Miss and get so embarrassed at missing, you leave the fight?" casting vicious mockery.
• Cathance shrieked, "Don't you take my necklace! Tortoise curse you!"
• The ghost swiped at her twice, but missed, perhaps because she was so short.
• Disappointed, he rose up through the ceiling again.

Cathance moved near where Tuala had been, and tried casting chill touch on the ghost in pyjammies.  The spell didn't injure her, but did constrain the ghost's ability to attack, or so Cathance thought.

• Hikawera couldn't see shit, and was annoyed.  He moved to the other side of Large Ondar, and also moved the spiritual weapon towards the double-doors; then held himself ready with more vicious mockery should the male ghost reappear.
• The lady ghost straightened up and looked at Quelenna.  While she was silent, Quelenna felt assaulted by a wave of terrible, terrible memories, not her own, overwhelming her mind.
  • It really was too much for the monk's mind to hold, and spilled over to Tuala, Cathance, and Hikawera.  Tuala was also overwhelmed.
  • The memories were: falling down on a dance floor, someone spilling wine on a dress, and a short, terrible view of a wave of water.
• Large Ondar, unaware of this silent tableau in the other Freelancers' minds, dashed into the bedroom, then, riding a surge of adrenaline he would never admit, pierced the ghost with his magical rapier.
  • The rune knight invoked his fire rune, which burned the ghost – but did not restrain her.
  • Frustrated, Large Ondar pierced the ghost again with his magical rapier.  By now she was looking pretty tattered.
• Quelenna's head hurt and she was kinda mad about the numbness too.  "This is bullshit!" she yelled, in part to cover up her own feelings about what she just experienced.
  • She struck at the ghost with her fans, slashing once and missing once.
  • That was enough to apply flurry of blows, which also landed once and missed once.
  • The monk used her ki to stun the ghost.
• Tuala shot the ghost with a firebolt.

The male ghost descended from the ceiling onto Hikawera and again tried to steal the bard's Alchemy Jug.

• Astounded, Hikawera cried, "Hey!  Leave the mayonnaise the fuck alone!" casting vicious mockery and giving the ghost a mayonnaise-induced headache.
• The ghost swiped at Hikawera with his clawed hands, missing the first swipe and leaving another stripe of necrosis with the second.
• The ghost went back up through the ceiling, blowing a raspberry at Hikawera as he went.
• The frustrated bard exclaimed, "This fuckhead!"

Cathance shot another bolt of pure chaos, this time at the stunned ghost in pyjammies.  It struck her with a sizzle of sparks, briefly outlining her form.

• Hikawera moved into the room, looking at the sparking ghost, and said, "I really hope Butterfingers McGee wasn't your husband, because that's pathetic," and the vicious mockery struck home.
  • The ghost disintegrated from pure shame, because apparently he was her husband.
• Large Ondar said, "Prepared to stab the next ghost Ondar sees."  He moved further into the bedroom, beyond Hikawera, and added, "We should stand apart."
• Quelenna turned around, scanning the bedroom, and moved to the chair.  She leaned on it, and it creaked, so she straightened.  "Will punch any ghost that shows up," she confirmed.
• Tuala declared, "I like this spacing suggestion," and readied to cast firebolt when the ghost reappeared.

The ghost came down where Hikawera had been standing, and where Tuala now was, and considered the nekomata.

• Tuala shot a firebolt and missed.
• The ghost stole Tuala's Astral Shard!  He held it forth in triumph, in both hands.
• The ghost's eyes lit up with glee, and with a macabre grin, he… shoved the Astral Shard into his own chest.  The Freelancers could see it within.
• Powered by the stolen magical item, the ghost slashed the sorcerer twice with his claws, leaving long stripes of bleeding necrosis in their wake.
• Hugging itself in the chest, it floated back up through the ceiling.

Cathance prepared to cast hypnotic pattern if the ghost appeared and tried to attack anyone other than herself.

• Hikawera said to Tuala, "Not lookin' good, we need you around here!" granting bardic inspiration.
  • Then he held himself ready with more vicious mockery should the ghost reappear.
• Large Ondar declared, "If ghost is unable to leave premises, then we should all but one leave, so we can locate the ghost, because Ondar feels lucky."
  • Large Ondar held himself still, ready to strike.
  • Cathance's face went flat; she obviously did not agree with this proposal.
• Quelenna replied, "That is an interesting theory, not sure I agree."
  • She wandered down the narrow part to the armoires, trying to provoke things.  Nothing appeared.
  • She opened the armoire on her left; it was full of moth-eaten fabrics and shoes gone bad.
  • She opened the armoire on her right; mostly the same, but found some nice gold & silver buttons.
• Tuala (who was still in the foyer) replied, "Like your suggestion, we've not seen it attack anyone outside of this room.  I'll come there, and you come here."
  • Tuala chugged a healing potion, but did not change positions; he readied to cast firebolt at the ghost.
  • Cathance made another face.

The ghost descended from the ceiling and, face twisted with glee, went after Tuala.

• Cathance cast hypnotic pattern positioned above the nekomata's head.  Nothing happened, because ghosts are immune to charm effects.
• HIkawera's uncharacteristically incoherent vicious mockery also had no effect.
• Tuala's firebolt missed the ghost.
• The ghost swiped at Tuala, and Large Ondar invoked his runic shield to protect him, forcing the ghost to miss.
• The ghost didn't miss the second time, and Tuala succumbed to the necrosis from his strike.
• Empowered by his triumph, the ghost pivoted to Large Ondar, and made a perfect swipe.  However Ondar wasn't exaggerating about feeling lucky, and he twisted around to force a critfail on the ghost.  Nevertheless the ghost still hung onto the Astral Shard he'd swiped from Tuala.
• The ghost turned and clawed Hikawera, leaving another stripe of necrosis across the Fire sagani.
• Then the ghost floated back up through the ceiling.

Cathance, with a sharp look at Large Ondar, walked over to Tuala and administered a healing potion to the unconscious nekomata.  Then she pulled out her magical warhammer, which everyone normally mocked because it just looks like a claw hammer.  "Guys, I'm going to hit this thief with booming blade, so don't try to stop him," she warned the others.

• Hikawera put up his weapons and moved to Tuala, then strummed a couple chords on his cittern, which applied cure wounds.  Then he moved away from the double doors towards the opposite wall.
• Large Ondar just readied his weapons to stab the next ghost he saw.
• By now Tuala was murmuring but not fully conscious.  Quelenna got out a superior healing potion and moved to him, and he murmured at her.
  • Tuala:  maybe over much
    Quelenna <confused>:  should I hand it to you?
    Tuala:  NO
    Quelenna:  I am ready to attack!
• Tuala woke all the way up to stare up at Quelenna from the floor.
  • Tuala:  …oh!  Thanks.
    Hikawera:  get the fuck up!
  • Tuala stood up, stretched, then cast protection from evil and good on himself.

The ghost came back down from the ceiling, straight down at Tuala.  His Astral Shard, after all, was glowing and visible in the ghost's chest.

• Cathance jumped up and hit him with booming blade, bludgeoning the ghost and booming him with thunder.
• Large Ondar pierced the ghost with his magical rapier.
• Quelenna crit the ghost with her fans, their magic tearing the last of the spirit apart.
• The Astral Shard fell, smacking Tuala in the forehead, and he yeowled in surprise.

For a moment, the only sound was the Freelancers putting up their weapons.  Then

Hikawera:  well, that fucking sucked
Tuala:  that, it did
Hikawera:  let's check out the room, now that things have been … unalived all over again.

Tuala looked at himself, the partially healed slashes and bloody clothing, and started using prestidigitation to clear the blood from himself and the floor.  Then the Freelancers split up to look for whatever they could find.

Quelenna looked in the armoires.  She found more buttons:  gold, silver, mother-of-pearl.  All in all worth 150 eagles.

Cathance looked in the foyer at the gaming tables.  She found a beautiful dragonchess set carved from semiprecious stones.

Tuala looked at the vanity next to the master bedroom wall.  He found 2 pairs of earrings, one dangly, one gold & jade.  He also found a gold & enamel brooch, and a ring of gold links.

Ondar looked at the other side of the foyer.  He found 5 goblets in a drawer and 6 goblets in another; and in a card table, a couple packs of cards well-eaten by silverfish.  Fucking silverfish.  Anyhow under those Ondar also found a 2" brass clockwork firefly, with a glass abdomen.  It was very pretty and got everyone's attention.

Tuala:  we want to identify !
Hikawera:  I can do that as a ritual cast.

Hikawera checked the bed and bedside tables.  He found super pretty jewelry:  a gold chain bracelet; a gold & silver cuff bracelet; a silver knotwork torc with two finials (one firefly and one flower); a silver bat earcuff, with rubies for eyes; and to his shock, still-good hair goop in a jar.

Tuala <wrinkled his nose at the goop>:  if it's not good, prestidigitation can clean it up
Hikawera:  prestidigitation is cheating
Tuala:  saves a lot of time

Cathance wandered over to check out the goblets Ondar had found.  They did not match.  Were they family-favourites?  She checked again; the goblets had no monograms.  Cathance pressed her lips together, dissatisfied.

Hikawera walked past her, and down the stairs.  The fancy door had a window in it, which was filthy, and it was overgrown and blocked.  He started clearing it for convenience's sake, and Cathance helped him.

Once open, the Freelancers walked out to the fresh air in the atrium, then mounted up and flew back to Freelancers Villa with all these items they removed.

Once they returned, instead of going to the tavern, the group took over the smallest meeting room, and Hikawera started ritual casting identify, starting with those goblets, 5 of which were magical in a different way:

• tankard of sobriety:  prevents the drinker from getting drunk.  Doesn't help against magic or poison.
• tankard of plenty:  3x a day, will fill with strong dwarven ale if the drinker murmurs a command word.
• Singing Stein:  Has a face on the side, and as soon as the stein has at least a few swallows of alcohol in it, the face will sing a relevant song.
• wine goblet of plenty:  3x a day, will fill with wine if the drinker murmurs a command word.
• Gravity Goblet:  when tilted, the liquid within flows up the upward side until it reaches the edge, at which time it falls down again.

Cathance proposed, with a perfect straight face, that they gift Kaikoa with the tankard of sobriety, and everyone laughed.  Then Hikawera turned to the jewelry.  The earrings, bracelets, and torc were mundane but expensive jewelry.  The other jewelry conveyed magical benefits to those who'd attuned.

• earcuff of the vampire bat:  suffer some necrosis in exchange for temporarily improving your hearing.
• brooch of shielding:  resistance to force and immune to magic missile.
• ring of free action:  immunity to magical slowing, paralysis, and restraint.

Finally, Hikawera checked the games and knicknacks.  The buttons and dragonchess set, while pretty, were mundane.  The clockwork firefly, though, was also magical.

• clockwork faefly:  works like a driftglobe, casts light on a command word, and once a day can cast faerie fire.  Flies around and hovers on its own.

All this identifyin'  was thirsty work, and Cathance by now had gotten the kitchen staff to provide a tray of snackies and some beverages.  The Freelancers considered all these items, and played with the tankards.  Hikawera decided he wanted the Gravity Goblet so he could prank people.  Ondar wanted the tankard of sobriety so he could try more drinks.  They decide to put the other tankards in the back tavern to amuse people.

On that note, Ondar wanted to try the drinks.  The wine goblet of plenty produced a light, fruity wine, which Ondar did not like.  He tried the tankard of plenty and decided beer was better, but not by much.  Hikawera said, "Heck, you might as well try the Alchemy Jug, too," and made it produce beer.  Ondar also did not like that.

Then Hikawera remembered the goop.  Identify said it was the pomade of ten thousand styles, which allowed the user to change hair style, colour, and length until sleepy times, and recharged its usages at dawn.  The bard determined he would keep that, if for no other reason than to annoy Dryali.

That left the other items, which the Freelancers divided up according to their preexisting inclinations.  Tuala took the brooch of shielding, and Quelenna the ring of free action; the rest of the jewelry would be sold (including the earcuff of the vampire bat).  Ondar took the clockwork faefly, and of course Cathance took the dragonchess set.  Her expression on claiming it appeared for all the world, to match the expression of the ghost's when he took Tuala's Astral Shard.