Oh Yeah

Oriotag, 2nd prime post-Periastron

Dryali had been showing Nix the Darkglobe he'd created in Vathia Estia when the two of them decided to ask about a mission.  Ondar, Tai, and Quelenna were also interested and the 5 of them went upstairs to the lounge.  The room was arranged just so, to draw a visitor's eyes to the imposing head of the minotaur, and they paused to look at it a moment before filing into Damakaios' office.  There was not a trace of disarrangement therein.

Ondar sat in an Ondar-sized chair.
Dryali sat in the darkest part of the room, and sprawled on the slightly-too-large chair.
Nix sat front-and-center, Mercury on her lap purring.
Tai took a seat on the front row to the right.
Quelenna just stood in the doorway, leaning on the doorjamb, one arm across her chest.

Damakaios opened a thin drawer and reached deep into it for papers, then started reciting missions.  As he spoke, Mercury purred louder.

Two missions for House Hadid:  phase spider venom & silk, and troll blood & teeth.  Will pay according to quantity and quality.

Third mission ‒ Track down clockwork owlbears for Bati Kasabasi.  There have not been any more attacks.  250gp/person.

Dryali interjected, "None in Vathia Estia."  Damakaios inclined his head slightly and continued.

Last mission – Hasapis winery wants Freelancers to come deal with whatever has been messing with winemaking.  The issue is in the building; I had a hard time getting info.  Earthquakes?  But no-one's been hurt.

Ondar:  so, we're dealing with bugs, or worms.
Damakaios:  that's what I think
Dryali:  curious about this clockwork owlbear thing
Ondar:  Ondar has no strong opinions.
Dryali:  I did ask around about the maker's mark in Vathia Estia.
Nix:  interested in owlbears as well.
Tai:  yeah, owlbears, kind of in worms
<A brief silence.  Quelenna shifted in the doorway.>
Damakaios:  sounds like not interested in the two for House Hadid.
<Everyone looked mulish.>
Tai:  the one time we took one of those missions, you do remember what we brought back?

So, Tahu and Fine Branch had brought back cheshire kittens, to Damakaios' deep displeasure.  Since then, Osric had released them back into the wild.

Damakaios:  no matter what you think, you are not allowed to bring back trolls or horrible spiders.
Quelenna:  so that's it?  Are those the only things we can not bring back?
Damakaios:  think about if you want to wake up with it looming over you.  If not, don't bring it back.

Ondar smiled, and Dryali tried to hide his amusement and failed.  Mercury purred even louder, and they took the clockwork owlbear mission.  As they left the office, Nix and Quelenna filled in Ondar, Tai, and Dryali with the details of their initial encounter.

Dryali:  should we check in with the Mayor?
Tai:  I think yes; in case there's more info where to go.
Ondar:  yes, let's do that.
Quelenna:  sure

Unsure about the adventure itself, Dryali picked up 8 days' worth of rations, and then they were off.

The Freelancers flew to Bati Kasabasi, a komodo town situated in the bend of a river in the western part of the crater.  Dryali, lacking a flying mount, used his hang glider.  The weather and drafts were stable enough that they got to the town in good order in the late afternoon, which was early enough to check in with the Mayor.  The town was slightly muggy, and surrounded by pens along the riverbank holding domesticated coypu.

The townspeople - mostly komodo, but some Pteroti and kero as well - watched them come in, and spoke more Primordial and Ophis than Trade, but the Freelancers still managed to secure rooms for the night and stable the mounts.  Then they sought out the Mayor, Thruxl.

Thruxl was a long wiry komodo, greenish with brown stripes; he wore an ornate chain of office, which was like a shoulder stole of coypu fur with a heavy silver chain.  He hid it well, but Nix and Quelenna (who'd met him before) as well as Tai (who could read komodo expression better than Dryali and Ondar) noticed he was surly about how long it had taken the Freelancers to return and followup on the mission before.

Thruxl:  there haven't – fortunately – not been any other incursions of owlbears or anything else out of the ordinary
Nix:  okayyyy
Dryali:  how about in neighbouring towns?
Ondar:  still paid to investigate?
Thruxl:  will pay for you to investigate.
Ondar:  Dryali and Nix.  Do you have shatter?
Dryali:  absolutely
Ondar <to Mayor>:  anything else you need?  Hate to have you waste your money.
Thruxl:  if you can retrieve stolen furs, would be great.
Ondar:  we'll see what we can do!

As if on cue, Tai started his bearskin cloak billowing.  Having no more to say, the Mayor took his leave, and the Freelancers returned to the tavern at the inn.  Since it was a Commonweal town, Ondar wanted to try the drinks.

The tavern had a mix of drinks more suitable to komodo than any Trading peoples.  Ondar asked for one of each of the three most interesting drinks.

• The first drink was the house ale, which in a world other than Skyway would be called an IPA.  It was better than Ondar was expecting.
• The second drink was Prairie Fire, and certainly deserved its name.  Ondar had tears in his eyes, and asked the bartender, "Why would you do this to Ondar?"  The bartender, who was rather proud of this concoction, lashed his tail angrily.
• The last drink was a mint julep, which was perfect and delicious and a good palate cleanser.

Kenostag, 2nd prime post-Periastron

The next day the Freelancers arose to discover the temperature had dropped and the humidity had risen to the point where it could be considered precipitation.  They prepared to revisit where the owlbears had gone underground anyhow, as that won't matter.  Ondar decided to bring Frostclaw, despite Nix's and Quelenna's warning it might be a challenge.

The cave entrance was south/southwest from Bati Kasabasi in the crater wall, and the heavy owlbear constructs had worn a trail that was fairly easy to follow.  As the Freelancers followed it, they looked for forks, to see if the owlbears had gone anywhere else.  Dryali and Nix were sure they had not.  <Narrator voice:  Shari rolled a nat 20 on perception>

After some time they got to the cave entrance, and it was indeed a tight squeeze for Ondar and Frostclaw; Ondar had to coax Frostclaw through.  While he was doing that, Dryali took off his eyes of the eagle and rubbed his eyes in the relaxing darkness.  Then he rummaged through his pack, and swapped the lens coverings so that they were no longer darkened.

There was only one way to go, and they followed it.  It twisted and turned and descended a bit.  Nix, who could not see in the dark at all, cast light on the tip of her broom.  After a couple of hours, the Freelancers were a bit turned around.  Of course, at that point they got to a large cavern with many exits.

Dryali asked Ondar to mark the entrance to the cavern from their path with a rune, so they'd know the return route.  Ondar did so, more on the big quinametzin's eye level than the little Dark elf's.  Then the Freelancers tried to figure out where to go.  Tai looked for tracks; Ondar had Frostclaw smell; Nix had Mercury smell.  The best they could come up with was "probably toward the east," so they went through the east cavern, with Ondar marking the path with runes.

The Freelancers were in luck; the cave floor was softer here and the tracks from the heavy constructs were easily visible.  They continued following into a teardrop-shaped cave, and realized they were tired, and had no real idea what time it was.  They decided to stop and have a rest.

Nix cast alarm on the area, and after some rations, they set watches and cast themselves into a sleep.

Dryali took first watch.  The cave air was still other than the breathing of his compatriots and Frostclaw.  He heard the comforting sounds of being underground:  dripping in the distance, and at some point a rock fell into a crevasse far away.  He perceived nothing to make him think the Freelancers were about to be attacked.

Tai took second watch.  He smelled the mustiness from the caves; maybe it was mushrooms.  Everything around them was pale in the dim light, and he heard rocks clicking.

Ondar took third watch.  He observed nothing in particular, beyond the occasional plink from the water dripping.

Quelenna took fourth watch.  She found it fairly quiet, and reflected on how strange it was, being in a cave.  The light never changed.

Remitag, 3rd prime post-Periastron

The next day dawned… somewhere the Freelancers couldn't see.  The Freelancers made ready, and resumed following the tracks of the owlbear constructs.  Tai and Ondar went in front, and could see the tracks as well as the occasional scrape on the cave wall.

As they proceeded, Dryali looked for signs on the walls, similar to the runes Ondar was scribing for them at the forks in their path.  He saw nothing, and wondered if instead of visual signs there were maybe magical markers.  He popped detect magic for this purpose, as Dark elves do, but nothing lit up other than the gear the Freelancers were carrying.

Hours passed in the timeless dark, and perhaps it was late afternoon when they reached a place that had signs of worked stone.  The walls became smoother, and started showing a sign of a shelf; the floor firmed and then transitioned to paving stones.  The tracks almost disappeared, but the tunnel had not forked, so the Freelancers kept going.

20 minutes later, the tunnel opened up into a larger cavern, about 15' tall, and longer than wide.  The cavern split in several different ways, two curving to the left and down, a middle one with visible ruins and the occasional sign of the owlbear constructs, and one to the right and upwards.

The Freelancers stopped; all were suspicious of a trap.  Nix and Mercury consulted, then Nix suggested exploring the side tunnels, "so as not to fully approach the direct way."  Ondar's eyes narrowed and in response, he suggested rolling the bones, and they quietly discussed what to ask the bones.

<Narrator voice:  at this point, Shari said "Dark elf", the GM said "Shit balls", and extended the map.>  Dryali could see the central tunnel curved around a solid part of the skylith, and more ruins beyond; perhaps the right tunnel reconnected with it.  He relayed what he could see to the others, and suggested Nix ask about the right side.

Nix pulled out her wyvern knucklebones and cast augury, declaring, "We would take the main path instead of the alternate path."  The bones indicated both weal and woe, which she did not like, and she again suggested an alternate path.

Dryali:  does Mercury have darkvision?
Nix:  yes, and invisible vision.  Do we want to check the north path?
Tai:  yes, I think we can ignore the one to the far left.

Mercury snuck up the path, which curved to the right and up.  The smell they'd been tracking diminished.  There was some worked stone, but it was less so as the winged cat progressed up the tunnel.

While Mercury was exploring, Dryali was looking at the ruined pillars of the main path, using his eyes of the eagle, trying to ascertain if they were carved, and if so, with what.  All he could tell was geometric designs of dwarvish origin.

Mercury got to a damp part, and the worked stone was weathered; it was clearly uninhabited, and the winged cat returned.  He went down the near left, which also curved and curved, with similar results.

Dryali was still peering at the pillars when Mercury came back, and determined they were not part of a trap.  <Narrator voice:  Shari rolled a nat 20 for traps>  He pointed out where the pillars were, which were barely visible, if at all, to the others. 

Quelenna:  more pillars…  I wonder what broke them.
Nix:  send Mercury to go ahead?
Tai:  go ahead

As Mercury carefully advanced, Dryali created a protector eldritch cannon.

* * session break * *

Mercury paused, having spotted a statue of a human-ish sized thing in full armour.  Nix relayed that to the others as Mercury stealthed forward, wings flipped back.  After 20 more feet, he saw two more such statues, next to "stuff" on both sides of the passage, just past where the tunnel curved around the solid bit.  The winged cat froze.  The stuff was half-ruined, but the floor around it was not-really paved, kind of gravelly.

Dryali had the protector pulse, bolstering himself and the rest of the Freelancers, and Frostclaw.  Then he asked if the statue was like those travel-raiding constructs.

Slowly, not disturbing the gravel, Mercury went to the closest statue and looked.  He did see some of the recognizable scrollwork that had been on the owlbear and the raiding constructs.  Then Nix's familiar faded back 20 feet again as Nix quietly relayed that to the others.

The Freelancers all moved forward a bit, as Dryali tried to recall, and finally said, "I have a vague memory they can fly."  He stayed behind everyone else.

Nix used her sorcerous abilities to twin cast dragon breath on Mercury and Ondar.  Dryali moved up next to Ondar as Mercury readied to breathe…

…and Dryali cast shatter on the nearest construct, the high-pitched whine echoing throughout the cave system, knocking the construct down and damaging the cave wall behind it.

Tai started out with a murmur, and it turned into a shout as he raged:  "That sounds an awful lot like what we're HERE TO FUCK UP!"  He moved to the prone construct and destroyed it with two swings of his magical battleaxe.  "Weak," he said scornfully as it fell apart in pieces.

• Dryali, Nix, and Tai felt a non-directional shaking in the ground.  Tai frowned.  "We might have company soon," he announced.
• The "statue" on the right hand side of the passage, which had a helmet with horns, floated over to Tai.
  • "See?  I told you!" Dryali exclaimed.
  • The construct attacked Tai twice, hitting the Silver dragonborn only once.  Tai's rage struck back with force.
• Nix walked up behind Mercury and cast chromatic orb at the construct, but it just floated on by, not connecting at all.
• From behind where the horned construct had been, the owlbear construct rambled in, drawn by the whine of Dryali's shatter.  It opened its mouth and shot a crossbow bolt at Tai, totally missing him.
  • So it shot another bolt at Nix, and critfailed; the bolt went closer to Mercury, but missed him too.
• Quelenna ran up to flank the horned construct, shaking open her fans on the way.  She slashed it once with her fans, whiffing the second time, then closed them and pummeled the construct with two unarmed strikes.
• Ondar also moved up to Mercury, and became large.  He threw a javelin at the horned construct, so hard it went through its chest and out the back.  Reddish light shone through the hole.
  • Frostclaw also moved up.
• Dryali also moved up, and the protector cannon pulsed weakly, which was no help.  The Dark elf cast faerie fire on the owlbear and unmoving construct, as one does when fighting in the caves.  However both constructs avoided its effects.
• Mercury breathed cold dragon breath on the horned construct.  The red light stopped and it locked up; then it crumbled to the ground in a pile of plate armour.
• The remaining construct floated right up to Nix.  It didn't glare at her, but only because it didn't have eyes.

All in all, things were going swimmingly:  two constructs down and two still engaged, about as the Freelancers were expecting.

Suddenly, the wall next to Tai, which Dryali had damaged with shatter, crumbled as a large, round, animated pitcher, full of red liquid, with two legs and two arms and a face across the front of it, broke through the wall and punched at the very surprised Tai and Quelenna.  Its "punch" seemed to actually be a thumbs-up, and fortunately it missed both of them.

Tai's rage had a new focus, and he swung his magical greataxe wildly at the big pitcher, missing.  Then his return slash sliced a bit into the glass, magically damaging it.

• The animated pitcher half-spun back and forth like for a dance, and raised its lid; red liquid sprayed Tai and Quelenna, who discovered to their displeasure that it was acid.  Quelenna avoided most of it, but Tai did not.
• Two mechanical ants came out of the ground, right next to Dryali and Frostclaw, and pincered both of them with their mandibles.  Once the mandibles pierced, both the Dark elf and the winged bear got zapped with a jolt of lightning too.
• The animated pitcher said in a deep voice, "OH YEAH!" and all the Freelancers found themselves punch-drunk <Narrator voice:  all attacks have disadvantage, all attacks on them advantage, I do not know how else to call that>
• Nix cast a twice-uplevel'd magic missile, sending a dart at each visible enemy:  the animated pitcher, the owlbear construct, the two mechanical ants, and the plate armoured construct that wasn't glaring at her because it didn't have eyes.
• The owlbear construct ambled over to Quelenna and flanked her.  It reared up and slammed her twice with its forelegs, bludgeoning her.
• Quelenna, flanked, quickly assessed where to attack, and turned her attention to the animated pitcher.  She slashed twice with her fans, and since the first slash bit into the glass as well, she followed up with a flurry of ineffective blows.  The last one critfailed as she overbalanced and fell prone, but the Wild elf rolled and smoothly regained her feet.
• Frostclaw bit the mechanical ant that had pincered him, but his teeth did nothing to it, so the winged bear moved to attack the plate construct.
  • The mechanical ant tried to pincer Frostclaw again and missed.
  • Frostclaw clawed at the plate construct but missed.
• Large Ondar drew his magical rapier and attacked both mechanical ants, piercing each ant.
• Dryali also drew his rapier, but missed his ant.
  • He moved the protector cannon forward, sensing Tai and Quelenna would need it.  The mechanical ant grabbed the protector in its pincers, but those cannons are tough.
  • The protector pulsed out its energy, bolstering Dryali and Large Ondar.
  • Dryali shifted to stand between Tai and Large Ondar.
• Mercury breathed cold dragon breath on one of the mechanical ants.  The cold locked up its legs and it died.
  • Mercury backed away 10' to put Frostclaw between him and everything else.
• The plate armoured construct slammed at Nix with its arms, but she cast shield and thus avoided being hit by them.

The Freelancers finally were clear of being punch-drunk, but the animated pitcher punched at Tai and Quelenna again, and its thumbs-up fist bludgeoned the monk.

• Tai tried slashing the big pitcher again, but missed.  His hand slipped on the backswing and he dropped the magical greataxe.  Swearing, he picked his weapon back up and shifted next to Quelenna…
• …just as the animated pitcher smiled and again said in its deep voice, "OH YEAH!" and Tai, Quelenna, Large Ondar, and even Frostclaw all found themselves punch-drunk again.
• Nix again cast a twice-uplevel'd magic missile, but this time sent all 5 darts at the plate armoured construct.  The force hit with a pompompom of the metal.
• The owlbear construct slammed each of Tai and Qulenna with its forelegs, bludgeoning them.
  • Tai's rage was so great that the owlbear construct was struck with force.
• Quelenna, very injured and punch-drunk, tried to slash the animated pitcher with her fans, but critfailed and slashed Tai instead.
  • Tai's rage struck like a living thing slamming the monk with force.
  • Quelenna's other attack was rebuffed by the glass pitcher so she followed up with a flurry of blows and then an open hand strike which knocked the pitcher prone!
  • The lid stayed on so it was not leaking acid.
  • "Take that," Quelenna told it.
• Large Ondar pierced the plate-armoured construct with his magical rapier, and it fell apart into a pile of plate.
  • The big quinametzin moved up next to the knocked-over pitcher.
    Dryali:  hey!  You're stepping on me!
    Large Ondar:  yah
  • Large Ondar crit the animated pitcher with his magical rapier, then invoked his fire rune to restrain it with fire chains.  It was not restrained, but the fire did crack the glass a little more.
  • Riding an adrenaline surge, Large Ondar pierced the knocked-over pitcher twice more.
• The knocked-over pitcher spun in place going "Woop woop woop", acid spraying out from under the lid and splashing Large Ondar, Tai, and Quelenna, who succumbed to her injuries and sank to the floor, unconscious.
• Dryali lost his patience.  He moved the protector cannon next to Tai and had it pulse, bolstering Tai, Large Ondar, Quelenna, Frostclaw, and himself.
  • Then he cast thunderwave, the boom echoing throughout the cave system, the thunder pushing the owlbear construct away from any Freelancers.
• Mercury stayed back, ready to dodge anything coming his way.

The animated pitcher righted itself, showing it really was magical <Narrator voice:  when was the last time your knocked-over pitcher of red liquid refreshment righted itself>, and promptly punched Large Ondar, one-two.  The first punch missed, but the second landed.  Large Ondar invoked the stone's endurance of his people to withstand the punch and then invoked his stone rune to incapacitate the thing, but that did not work.

• Tai, raging, recklessly attacked the pitcher, and with two strikes of his magical greataxe, shattered the glass.
  • Right as it shattered, it said, "Oh nooooo," then the acid within was everywhere, splashing Large Ondar and Tai, who were expecting it and dodged most of it; but also Dryali, the protector, and, Quelenna, who did not.
  • Tai pivoted to the owlbear construct.
• Nix cast a twice-uplevel'd chromatic orb at the owlbear construct, which settled on cold before it struck.
• Large Ondar, seeing Quelenna down and acid-burned, moved to her and administered a healing potion.
• Frostclaw bit the owlbear construct with a critical hit, but his teeth did nothing to it either.
• Dryali shot a firebolt at the owlbear construct, but the bolt pinged off the owlbear's shoulders.
  • He repositioned the protector cannon and had it pulse again.
• Mercury, feeling this was well in hand, started preening.

Tai wielded his greataxe against the owlbear construct and missed, but caught it with the return stroke.

• Nix cast an uplevel'd chromatic orb at the owlbear construct, which settled on cold before it struck.
  • The human then used her sorcerous abilities to refresh her ability to cast a higher-level spell.
• The owlbear construct swung both of its forelegs at Tai, and the second one connected.  Tai was bludgeoned, and his rage struck back with force.
• Quelenna, awake, immediately consumed a healing potion of her own.  Then she leapt up and slashed at the owlbear construct with her fans.  The first one slashed it, and the second one whiffed.
• Large Ondar got in the owlbear construct's face.  Then he crit with his magical rapier, thrusting the blade down the owlbear's "throat", all the way to the forte, destroying the mechanics within.  The thing fell flat, legs splayed out from it unnaturally.

Dryali wasted no time; he immediately cast detect magic and inspected all the constructs.  They were not special, their animating magic fading out.  He checked the crates, they had no magic.  He looked up the tunnel; it curved away south.  He checked the alcove that had held the animated pitcher; it has been bricked in with no mortar.

The other Freelancers were checking the crates.  They were flimsy, and Ondar opened one to find it was empty.  He scowled.

Ondar and Dryali:  where did the owlbear come from?
Dryali:  this is fail
Tai:  the mission was to track the owlbear
Dryali:  the mission was to track where the owlbears came from, and bring back furs.
Tai:  yeah

The Freelancers checked more carefully for other tracks.  Finding none, they recollected the flying suits of armour.  They went down the tunnel, and after about 120' they found where the owlbear had been hidden.  As they returned to the crates, they talked about how no more owlbears were coming to Bati Kasabasi.

Examining the crates more closely, they realized the crates were setup as traps; and the traps were actually the mechanical ants, which had burrowed their way to the Freelancers during the fight.

Quelenna was swaying on her feet, and Dryali cast an uplevele'd cure wounds on her, which helped a little.  Then, putting up his shield, he walked over to the shattered pitcher, and picked up the handle.  It was unbroken and pretty heavy.  Smiling, he cast dancing lights in the glass.  It lit up the cave, and looked really cool.

With the aid of this light, the Freelancers gathered all the parts:  3 suits of damaged plate armour, the owlbear parts, the two mechanical ants.  The crates had nothing worth gathering.  Between Nix's bag of holding and Dryali's handy haversack, storage and transport of all these parts was easy.

As an afterthought, Dryali shoved the glass handle into the handy haversack too.

The return to Bati Kasabasi was uneventful; three days of retracing their steps, made easy with Ondar's runes.  The Freelancers squeezed out of the cave in the early afternoon, blinking in the daylight.  Dryali put dark lenses back into his eyes of the eagle and put them back on.

Once back in Bati Kasabasi, they met with the Mayor and described their discoveries.  They explained the dummy crates and the trap, and grimly showed him the head of the owlbear construct.  Thruxl's reaction was a mix of relief and surliness.  He was relieved the attacks from the owlbear constructs really were stopped, but the losses of the stolen furs had been significant and he'd been hoping to recover them.

Nonetheless, he paid the mission fee of 250gp.  The Freelancers took their leave and returned to Ripa Daneo, arriving mid-evening.  The next day, they worked with Alvyn to sell all these mechanical parts:  1500gp for the plate constructs, 450gp for the owlbear parts, and 350gp for the mechanical ants.