War of the Roses

Word spread across the Freelancers Tavern that a group on mission had found an entire compound of Daystar worshippers.  The heresy never failed to shock, and it dominated the gossip.

Among those gossipping were Maghris, Dominic, and Peb, with Meurig and Lorcan listening.  The big Black dragonborn had started training as a paladin of Ua some time ago.  Anyhow, the 5 of them decided a mission was in order, so they rose to go upstairs and talk to Arnari.

Now, the shortest route upstairs to Arnari's office is from the public tavern, which despite the early hour was still populated with customers.  As the 5 Freelancers passed through to the foot of the stairwell, one of these, a human man with slicked-down hair, flagged the group down.

Slick hair:  hey hey!  Please!  I have a business proposition
Peb:  hello good sir, how many we help you today?
Slick hair:  I have a great business plan, but I need you to do it!  If you go to the eastern side of the marsh– Ha'aheo can't go there– bring back herbs, or find a monster, bring back its hide– I know who to sell it to
Dominic:  so, your contribution to this deal is, you know who to sell this to.
Slick hair:  exactly!  I have connections!  Trade secrets, man
Peb:  we're not the ones to bring missions to.  Have you talked to them?
Slick hair:  if I want to lose all my profits!
Dominic <scowled>:  slave trade secrets
Slick hair:  what?!  Herbs and rare beast parts
Dominic:  we talk; when people want us to do these, there is always an attempt to capture for Hindmarsh slave pits.
<The slick-haired fellow appears very surprised.>
Dominic:  I don't expect to see you when I get back.  <Walked up the stairs.>
Slick hair:   is… he always uptight?  Did I do something wrong?
Peb:  not 20% as uptight, so yeah, you did.  <thought carefully> but in light of Dominic, how many people have you sent to the marsh, and how many came back?
Slick hair:  always came back!  Well, one person came back– well, only half did– they picked a different monster.
Meurig <uncomfortable>:  unsure about this.  Maybe I should go to see if it's legal and report it
Lorcan:  did you say you sent Freelancers on this before?
Slick hair:  no, other people.  Freelancers are chickenshits

Peb launched into a paean about the virtues of chickenshit, and Lorcan just shook his head and walked upstairs.

Peb:  Ah'm so sorry, Ah forgot myself.  What was your name, good sir?
Slick hair:  I didn't give you my name
Peb <reproachfully>:  we are acquiantances.  Ah'm Peb Pebbles.
Slick hair <finished his beer>:  I'm going to go find people who are brave

Without another word, the human man left the bar, with Peb, Meurig, and Maghris standing around his now empty table.  Maghris shrugged, and the Freelancers went upstairs to talk to Arnari.

Dominic, highly irritated, had just finished asking Arnari how to handle people like that slick-haired guy when Lorcan entered and took a seat in the front row of chairs so he could see Arnari and she would see that.

"Just ignore it," the Freelancers' leader told Dominic, "They can drink and talk all they want but if they are trying to avoid the fee, it's probably the best."

Maghris entered, took in the tableau, then sat in the one chair he'd determined deals with his fluffy tails properly.  He made a great show of arranging his tails.

Meurig came in, and Arnari raised an eyebrow.  He saluted her quite properly, seated himself, and asked about the most recent big missions that had happened while he was occupied with paladin training.  Arnari told him about Mazandyth's visit, and requirement of restoring a Shrine of the Snake.  Peb entered while they were talking, and was so preoccupied by the conversation they sat in far too small a chair in the back row of seats.

Meurig took care to get the exact names of the green dragons involved from Arnari, but then it was time to learn about the missions from her.  She informed them of a lull, and only had three that were appropriate:

• In the Northridge Mountains, gryphon eggs.  150 eagles/egg, bring back 12 get a gryphon.  I think you all have mounts.
• Pirates Dream– fine something unnatural & remove it.  100 eagles + an uncommon potion for each of you.
• Go to House Drogo– someone needs to investigate their gardens, rose bushes have become aggressive.

The druids (that'd be Dominic and Peb) frowned.

Peb:  aggressive how?
Meurig:  maybe too much fertilizer
Arnari:  they are attacking visitors
Peb:  would like to know what fertilizer!
Dominic <darkly>:  shake down the guy in front and find out
<An awkward pause ensued.>
Dominic:  I'm okay with any of these; prefer rosebushes
Lorcan:  I'm against doing more eggs
Meurig:  I know Sonya Drogo

So, rosebushes it would be.  House Drogo is in Parkside, a 30-minute walk from Freelancers Tavern, so the Freelancers walked over, except for Peb who brought their cart, pulled by their mule Mary Jane.

The house itself was very nice, with a small formal lawn on the street-facing front.  The Freelancers rolled up and knocked on the front door.  A human man opened it.  He was in very nice plate armour with a greatsword on his back, and seemed stoic.  This was Aron, Lady Sonya's man-at-arms.

Aron:  M–!  How can House Drogo help you?
Meurig:  hello good sir, it's more what we can do for you.  As you can see, we are Freelancers, and Lady Drogo asked for our help.
Aron:  I think I remember you.  M–  M–  M–
Meurig:  Knight Meurig, here to serve you
Aron:  Meurig, that's it!

Lady Sonya entered the room behind Aron with great energy, followed by a short human woman attendant in livery.  Peb stepped back a ways at seeing such fine people.  "Freelancers!!!" she exclaimed, "It is so good to see you.  These rosebushes have gotten so rowdy!  Follow me, it's going to be so fun."  At these words, Aron stood aside to admit the Freelancers, but glared at the others as they came past him, ready to act if they had ill will or other designs on Lady Sonya's person.   Lorcan returned the glare guilelessly, but Peb was uncomfortable, and glanced around for the servants' entrance.

Lady Sonya:  oh the gardens, it's been so hard not to have a garden party, it's such a mess
Lorcan:  may we know when it started, my lady?
Lady Sonya:  just before the Planting Holiday, such a dreadful disaster.  We had invited so many people over for a garden party and had to retract the invitations. It was really such a shame, but better to cancel than have mysterious injuries.

Lady Sonya led the Freelancers and the attendant through the house to the back patio, talking the entire way.  The patio led out to formal gardens, which appeared a little overgrown and untended, a startling sight in the context of so much wealth and intentionality.

Meurig:  so you aren't using the gardens anymore.
Lady Sonya:  our gardeners have been having the hardest time.  They can't go in there without getting attacked by these vicious rosebushes and other plants.
Maghris:  seems reasonable, is there a particular part of the garden that's a problem, or is it a general thing?
Lady Sonya:  Lue, can you be a dear, and fetch the gardener who can answer this

The attendant, Lue, left them, and returned in short order with a Rock sagani, whose presence really reduced Peb's discomfort with the tableau.

Lady Sonya:  this is Boleck, he takes care of the garden and he is so great, just very good with the plants. The flowers just blossom under his care. Oh here he is! Boleck, these are Freelancers, they have come to get to the bottom of what's happening but first they had some questions, this one— what is your name again?
Maghris:  Maghris Bloomfield the 18th.
Lady Sonya:  Maghris wanted to know if the problem was restricted to a particular part of the garden.
Boleck:  it started in the back part of the garden, then started mixing in with the rest.
Peb:  fertilizer?  Did it change?
Boleck:  no, hadn't changed.  I try to bury fish under the rosebushes, and cover with mulch, no smell.  But it hasn't changed.
Lorcan <gave Boleck a sharp look>:  undesirable, fish.
Meurig <said something the Narrator did not write down, but undoubtedly included a mention of Lakeview.>
Lorcan:  what are we to do?
Lady Sonya:  whatever you need.  <looked out at the garden>  please don't level the garden
Boleck <sighed in resignation>:  don't burn it all
Maghris:  is there anything in particular you want saved?
Lady Sonya:  I want to have parties again
Boleck:  please don't burn it all
Lorcan:  any new plants in there recently?  <Lorcan's tone indicated he expected a "no".>
<Lady Sonya looked at Boleck.>
Boleck:  nothing new
Lorcan <to Freelancers>:  we should do a detect magic, because if we don't, we could burn the entire thing and the problem is not solved.

The Freelancers peered out at the tranquil garden, looking for any plants that appeared out of place.  Nothing looked unnatural or unusual for a garden left untended for the last three primes.  A grassy area was between the patio and a fountain, beyond which were rosebushes and other flowerbeds with paths in between.  To the near left of the fountain, one of the rosebushes was a little wilted.  A small pond was to the right, and at the left side of the back wall was a gate.  A path led to the gate alongside the left half of the back wall.  Between the pond and the right half of the back wall were pretty irises.

<Narrator voice:  all descriptions of the garden layout and plant positioning will continue to be from the same perspective, of a person standing on the patio.>

Peb asked Boleck, "Ah got a cart, can Ah bring it 'round back?"  Boleck looked startled, but said, "uh, yeah, there's a alley."  Peb headed back to the front to go get their cart.

Maghris decided to ritual cast detect magic.  He had everyone clear a space, combed his tails, then did a complicated dance with Mr Zircon.  As he did this, Aron showed up, clearly having just let Peb out the front door to retrieve their cart.

When he was done, Maghris saw his fellow Freelancers light up with a plethora of magic items, weapons, potions, rings, trinkets.  But the House Drogo folks also lit up:  Aron's greatsword was glowing; Lady Sonya' wide silvery ring had strong abjuration, and she had something else in her hair; Lue had two or three things at her waist, and one at her shoulder, which appeared to be weapons, perhaps some brass knuckles?

Bemused, Maghris turned his attention to the garden, but nothing in range of the patio set off his detect magic.

The back gate opened, and Peb came in pushing a wheelbarrow, loaded with extra shovels.  They cast detect poison or disease but nothing in range lit up from the spell.  From the patio, Maghris moved into the garden slowly, his attention on the detect magic, with Mr Zircon floating along side his head.  Lorcan dropped into stealth and followed some 25' behind.

The plants came alive, clearly focussed on the intruders:  Peb, Maghris, Lorcan.  Not just the rosebushes: an enormous bougainvillea vine reared up, and the irises and tulips near the pond reoriented themselves.  On the patio, Aron moved into a defensive position in front of Lady Sonya, and Lue moved up next to her.

Lorcan ran up to put the fountain between himself and all these moving plants, then cast infestation on the big bougainvillea.  As plant parasites descended on it, the vine moved 5' away from Maghris.  "Ha!  It can move!" Lorcan called out.

• Peb saw the rosebush in front of them move, and looked at their wheelbarrow, which had shovels in it, but nothing else.  "Shit, aw shit," they exclaimed, "Ah forgot the shit!"
  • They dropped the wheelbarrow and pulled out the shovel that was strapped to their back.  They then shaped into a bear, still holding the shovel in their mouth.
  • Disengaging, they went near a different rosebush, near the center of the back wall, but then the detect poison or disease detected patches of poison in the irises on the closest side of the bond.
  • Since they were still a bear they tried to point the shovel at the patches of poison, making angry bear noises which nobody else could interpret.
• The wilty roses to the left of the fountain suddenly lashed out and struck an unsuspecting Maghris with thorn whip, which pierced through his fluffiness and pulled him 10' closer.
  • Maghris screamed.  "WhaaaaaH!"
• Maghris then pulled out his light crossbow and shot the wilty roses with a bolt that immediately disappeared.  The plant shook unnaturally and unhappily.
  • Mr Zircon struck the wilty roses with force!
  • Maghris ran behind Lorcan, putting the Pastoral gnome between himself and the wilty roses.  Mr Zircon floated over to where the nekomata was.
• The bougainvillea rustled, then struck bear Peb with its thorny vines!  The thorns pierced them and the vines did not let go, holding bear Peb in place.
• Meurig moved to the path.  The black Dragonborn was wearing his shield, but instead of a weapon he pulled out a wand from his belt, and pointed it at the bougainvillea to cast web.  Now it was restrained, although it was still holding bear Peb in place.
• Dominic cast flaming sphere against the wall on the other side of the rosebush from bear Peb.  He rolled it through the irises in far right corner of the garden and had it ram that rosebush, which died from the flames.
• The rosebush near the gate ran over to bear Peb and clawed them with thorny shrubbery.
• The irises in the far right corner moved 20' towards the patio, and shot Dominic with pollen!  His eyes watered and his nose ran fiercely, but the druid shook it off.
• The irises next to the flaming sphere moved a few feet towards bear Peb and shot the bear with pollen!  They also shook it off.
• Patches of tulips appeared next to the wilty roses!  One patch moved up to Meurig, the other to Lorcan.  Somehow these struck the two Freelancers and held onto them.
  • Meurig's web dropped.

Lorcan immediately tried to wiggle out of the tulips' grasp, but failed.

• Bear Peb was getting poisoned by the bougainvillea's thorns!  They raged, the bear's snarled echoing off the walls, and broke out of its grasp.
  • As they moved away from the big bougainvillea, the rosebush next to them struck again with thorny shrubbery, but the rage shook most of that off.
• The wilty roses reached out to touch bear Peb, but wasn't able to, so it just looked like a flailing, wilted plant.
• Maghris looked in horror at Lorcan wrapped in a tulip.
  • Lorcan:  you don't know it won't wrap you next!
    Maghris:  Mr Zircon, attack this tulip, especially these vines around Lorcan!
  • Mr Zircon struck the vines with force, and they released Lorcan, who was visibly happier.
  • Maghris shot the tulip with his light crossbow, then moved away towards the right wall.
• The bougainvillea went after bear Peb, who had sustained a lot of attacks.  The thorns again pierced the bear, which shimmered and transformed into Rock sagani Peb armed with a long shovel.  Unfortunately, they were again held fast by the thorny vines.
• Meurig pulled a paper with arcane markings on it out of his belt pouch and chewed it carefully.  Then he exhaled cold dragon's breath on the tulip grasping him and the bougainvillea beyond.  The cold did not seem to do much to the big vines.
• Dominic rammed the flaming sphere into the bougainvillea, but it also did less to the vines and papery flowers than expected.  Perhaps it was resistant to temperature changes?
  • The druid cast guiding bolt on the bougainvillea, burning it with holy radiance.
• The rosebush moved back up to Peb and crit them with thorny shrubbery.  Perhaps these plants took their shovel personally.
• The irises moved towards the patio, then shot Dominic and Meurig with pollen.  For both of them, the pollen made their eyes water so much that they were temporarily blinded.
  • Lady Sonya sucked in her breath, and everyone on the patio took a step back.
• The tulips holding Meurig squeezed him very hard.  The Black dragonborn could feel the bruises.
• The other tulips moved to Lorcan and tried to grab him again, but he avoided their grasp.

Lorcan cast infestation on the tulips that tried to attack him, and they moved away from him and also Meurig.  He moved himself behind blinded Dominic.

• Peb transformed into a giant spider!  Giant-spider Peb recklessly shot webs at the bougainvillea, holding it in place.
• The wilty roses reached out to touch giant-spider Peb, and where they did so, necrosis spread on the giant spider.  The branches involved bloomed green, as the wilty roses clearly healed from the experience.
• Maghris decided what's good for Lorcan is good for Meurig.  "Mr Zircon, try to attack tulips on Meurig!"
  • Mr Zircon struck the tulips on Meurig with force.  But they did not let go.
  • Maghris shot the tulips with his light crossbow.  The magical bolt pierced the tulips and they withered and died.
  • The nekomata, realizing he was now exposed, moved back next to Lorcan.
• The bougainvillea squeezed giant-spider Peb, damaging the chitin with squeezy damage.  But it could not move because of the webs, and was burned a bit by the flaming sphere.
• Meurig cried out, "Guide me!  I will spit acid!"  and pointed where he intended to do so.  Lorcan called out directions until Meurig was pointing at the bougainvillea, and then he spit acid at it, burning the webbed plant.
  • He then backed up carefully, by feel, until he was touching the fountain.
• Dominic cleared out his eyes.  Blinking still, he rammed the flaming sphere into the irises that has shot the pollen at him, burning them.
  • The druid started to back up, but Lorcan hissed, "Don't step on me!" so he instead moved to the left, away from the irises
• The rosebush tried to hit giant-spider Peb but did not.
• The irises shot Lorcan and Meurig with pollen.  Lorcan avoided getting blinded, but Meurig could not, being already blinded.
• The tulips Lorcan had run away from came closer to Dominic, and attacked him, grappling him.

Lorcan got out his blowgun of warning, then moved close enough to get a good shot at the bougainvillea, and crit.  The needle split some of the wood as Lorcan hit in just the right spot.

• Giant-spider Peb broke out of the bougainvillea's thorny grasp and moved right next to the big plant.
  • As Peb moved away the wilty roses reached out and touched them again, adding more necrosis and healing themselves even more.  At this rate we might have to stop calling them "wilty roses"!
  • Giant-spider Peb succumbed to the necrosis and became Rock sagani Peb, standing next to the bougainvillea, with a large, very sharp shovel in their hands.
• The wilty roses were enjoying themselves and touched Peb again, dealing the angry Rock sagani necrosis and turning even more green.
• Maghris stuck with what seemed to be working.  "Mr Zircon, attack tulip vines holding Dominic!"
  • Mr struck the tulips on Dominic with force, and they let go.
  • Maghris shot at the tulips with his light crossbow, but went wide.
  • He stayed put.
• The bougainvillea tried to smash Peb, but missed.
• Meurig cast enhance ability and put Bear's Endurance on himself.
• Dominic had the flaming sphere ram one of the irises, burning it.
  • The druid, who was more than a little peeved, cast erupting earth to the far right of the fountain, under the bougainvillea and the irises.  These and all the other plants in the area died as a result.
    • On the patio, Boleck groaned.
  • Dominic, who'd seen Lorcan's blowgun needle, moved to the other side of the tulips and called out, "Come get it, Lorcan!"
• The rosebush smacked Peb with its thorny shrubbery again.
• The tulips grabbed Dominic and squeezed him with their vines, holding him fast.

Lorcan frowned at Dominic, but moved a little away from the patio for a clear shot and shot the tulips with another blowgun needle.  They still grasped Dominic, so Lorcan hid in a nearby bush, that was just an ordinary plant.

• Peb had had it by now, and recklessly slashed the rosebush with their shovel.
• The wilty roses tried to slash Peb!  But they missed.
• Maghris shot the tulips with his light crossbow, killing them.
  • Mr Zircon tried to strike the wilty roses, but missed.
• Meurig could finally see again!  He moved to put the wilty roses between himself and the rosebush, then breathed the cold dragon's breath again.   The wilty roses wilted again, and the rosebush died from the cold.
• Dominic cast another guiding bolt on the wilty roses, but the bolt simply shot past them harmlessly.
  • He moved the flaming sphere to slam into the wilty roses, so those leaves not damaged from cold got a bit crispy.

Lorcan moved to the right of the fountain, since the bush he was hiding in did not give him a clear shot, and shot another blowgun needle at the wilty roses.  Again the needle hit the wood of the bushes just right, splitting it.  The wilty roses died, falling still and dropping almost to the ground; then, to the Freelancers' amazement, they stood up again.

• Peb immediately attacked the wilty roses' roots with their shovel.  Attacking at the base of the plant with abandon, they severed the roots.
  • The wilty roses fell, then twisted, and stood back up!  An air of defiance emanated from them.
  • Peb was acting recklessly, but not enough to remain next to the flaming sphere; they moved away.
• The wilty roses moved away from both Peb and the flaming sphere, but this allowed Meurig to punch them with a gauntleted fist, and they dropped again, but twisted and rose again in defiance.
• Maghris shot them with his light crossbow.  The wilty roses fell again, and finally stayed down.

From the patio, Sonya Drogo started golf-clapping.

Dominic, still a bit bent, started burning random bits of the garden with the flaming sphere.  Lorcan, on the other hand, moved to the irises and inspected them.  The pollen, he found, would be good for blinding powder.  As he carefully poked through the iris bits and the disrupted earth underneath them, he found the confirmation he sought.  "The fish are from Lakeview!!" he exclaimed, "Pollution from Pirates Dream!!"

Lady Sonya stopped her golf clap as the Freelancers returned to the patio.  "Oh, that was amazing," she started, then instead of continuing with her chatter, she said, "I hated it.  Lue, pay them– Boleck."  Boleck blanched at her tone.

Lorcan:  Boleck– no more fish.
Maghris:  no; just not from Lakeview.
Lorcan:  sure, you can use fish from Kizil.
<Boleck blanched again.>
Peb:  Ah can help with fertilizer.

Lue returned and paid them each a string of 100 eagles.  "Make sure you give 10% to Arnari," she admonished them.  Boleck led them across the garden and out the back gate, partly so Peb could get their wheelbarrow and cart, but mostly so the Freelancers didn't track mud & blood through the house.

The Freelancers headed back across town, feeling oddly subdued and not like they'd had any kind of victory at all.  After a few blocks, Lorcan mused, "Maybe for this, we should be telling Arnari we deserve a potion." 

Upon return to Freelancers, Arnari was taken aback at how torn up the Freelancers were, especially Peb and Meurig.  As they turned in the Freelancers' Cut, the group explained to Arnari that the root cause of the problem was the pollution from Pirates River.

Meurig:  we should warn other gardeners
Peb:  Ah took samples

Meurig continued, applying the powers of persuasion that only earnestness can imbue <Narrator's voice: well, and also Yann rolled a nat 20>, convincing Arnari to issue a potion to the party.  She brought them out, and also noted she was convinced the wizard Gwidion needed a visit.  Anyhow, the potions were:  oil of slipperiness, Dominic; philter of love, Lorcan and Meurig; potion of water breathing, Maghris and Peb.

The following day, Dominic and Peb returned to House Drogo to help Boleck with garden restoration.  Peb brought their cart, and plenty of fertilizer.